觉言觉语｜103 条凯文凯利希望他年轻时就知道的智慧（中英双语）

“

凯文·凯利（英语：Kevin Kelly，1952年4月28日－），常被称为“KK”，《连线》杂志（Wired Magazine）第一任主编；曾担任《全球评论》（Whole Earth Review）主编、出版人。KK具有多重身份：作家（代表作《失控》）、摄影家、自然资源保护论者，同时还是亚洲文化、数字文化领域的学者。

凯文凯利每年都会写下一些人生建议，今年在他 70 岁生日之际，他将这些人生建议补充到103条，作为送给大家的生日礼物。并附言，这是他希望自己年轻时候就知道的智慧。

网上也有其他翻译，但感觉其他翻译版本感觉不合我意，因此我自己翻译了一遍，去尝试感悟每句话背后的深意，并且锻炼自己最近丢失的专注力。同时五四青年节也即将到来，希望这篇文章能给广大青年朋友们带去更多有益的启示。

其中有两条我自己并没有理解句子本身的意义，希望读者朋友们给我反馈，多谢。

原文：103 Bits of Advice I Wish I Had Known^[1] ，于 2022年4月28日发布

1. 在你人生的 99% 的时光中，只有此刻才是对的时间。

About 99% of the time, the right time is right now.

2. 只有你自己更清楚你拥有什么。（你可能想通过名牌名表名包来赢得别人的尊重，但你不需要打肿脸充胖子，你其实可以通过善良来赢得同样的尊重）

No one is as impressed with your possessions as you are. 这句话在《The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel》一书中也出现过。

3. 不要为你不想成为的人卖命。

Dont ever work for someone you dont want to become.

4. 重视身边真正爱你的人，而非博取千万粉丝的喜爱。

Cultivate 12 people who love you, because they are worth more than 12 million people who like you.

5. 去犯新的错误，而不是总犯同样的错误。

Dont keep making the same mistakes; try to make new mistakes.

6. 用实际行动尊重和回报别人为你的付出。（如果你停下来听一位音乐家或街头艺人表演一分钟，你就欠他们一美元）

If you stop to listen to a musician or street performer for more than a minute, you owe them a dollar.

7. 记住，在“但是”之前说的任何话都不算数。

Anything you say before the word “but” does not count.

8. 宽恕，是我们给自己的礼物。他人不会因为你的宽恕而感知到什么，但是宽恕可以治愈你自己。

When you forgive others, they may not notice, but you will heal. Forgiveness is not something we do for others; it is a gift to ourselves.

9. 礼貌不会花费你任何成本。用完马桶后放下马桶盖。乘坐电梯时先下后上。把购物车放回指定区域。当你借东西时，归还时要比你得到时的状态更好（装满、清洁）。

Courtesy costs nothing. Lower the toilet seat after use. Let the people in the elevator exit before you enter. Return shopping carts to their designated areas. When you borrow something, return it better shape (filled up, cleaned) than when you got it.

10. 无论何时，如果有两个对立面发生冲突时，请找出第三方。

Whenever there is an argument between two sides, find the third side.

11. 效率被严重高估，而玩乐则被严重低估。定期安排的安息日、公休日、假期、休息日、漫无目的的散步和休息时间对于任何类型的顶级业绩都是必不可少的。最好的工作标准需要伴随良好的休息标准。

Efficiency is highly overrated; Goofing off is highly underrated. Regularly scheduled sabbaths, sabbaticals, vacations, breaks, aimless walks and time off are essential for top performance of any kind. The best work ethic requires a good rest ethic.

12. 当你成为领导时，你真正的工作是创造更多领导者，而非追随者。

When you lead, your real job is to create more leaders, not more followers.

13. 私下批判，公开赞扬。

Criticize in private, praise in public.

14. 人生的课程将以它们需要的顺序出现在你面前。任何你需要掌握的课程其实都在你身上。当你真正掌握了一节课之后，下一节课就会出现。如果你还活着，这就意味着你还有课程需要学习。

Life lessons will be presented to you in the order they are needed. Everything you need to master the lesson is within you. Once you have truly learned a lesson, you will be presented with the next one. If you are alive, that means you still have lessons to learn.

15. 学生的职责是从老师身上得到一切（知识），而老师的职责是从学生身上得到一切（无知）。

It is the duty of a student to get everything out of a teacher, and the duty of a teacher to get everything out of a student.

16. 如果「赢得胜利」的结果变得比游戏过程而更加重要，那么就尝试改变规则，让游戏更加有趣。改变规则可以创造新的游戏。

If winning becomes too important in a game, change the rules to make it more fun. Changing rules can become the new game.

17. 向投资者要钱，他们会给你建议；但是向他们寻求建议，他们则会给你钱。

Ask funders for money, and they’ll give you advice; but ask for advice and they’ll give you money.

18. 生产力通常是一种干扰。不要追求更好的方法来尽快完成任务，而要追求让你永远都不想停下来的任务。(追求过程而非结果)

Productivity is often a distraction. Don’t aim for better ways to get through your tasks as quickly as possible, rather aim for better tasks that you never want to stop doing.

19. 立即支付你欠供应商、工人、承包商的款项。下次他们会不遗余力地与你合作。

Immediately pay what you owe to vendors, workers, contractors. They will go out of their way to work with you first next time.

20. 我们对自己最大的欺骗就是：“我不需要把它写下来，我能记住它”。

The biggest lie we tell ourselves is “I dont need to write this down because I will remember it.”

21. 作为一个有自主意识的人，你的成长是由你愿意进行的不舒服的对话的数量来衡量的。

Your growth as a conscious being is measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations you are willing to have.

22. 讲话要自信，因为你要表达正确的观点；而聆听要细心，因为你可能因此发现自己的错误。

Speak confidently as if you are right, but listen carefully as if you are wrong.

23. 无论您身在何处，附近都会有一把非常精确的尺子。学会用身边的工具去解决问题。（原意：与肩同高地伸出手臂，左右两手指尖的距离就是你的身高。）

Handy measure: the distance between your fingertips of your outstretched arms at shoulder level is your height.

24. 你努力的连续性（锻炼、陪伴、工作）要比努力的次数更重要。没有什么比每天做的小事更重要，这比你偶尔做的事要重要得多。（习惯的力量）

The consistency of your endeavors (exercise, companionship, work) is more important than the quantity. Nothing beats small things done every day, which is way more important than what you do occasionally.

25. 艺术创作不是利己行为，而是利他的。如果你不去做你自己的事，那就是自欺欺人。

Making art is not selfish; it’s for the rest of us. If you don’t do your thing, you are cheating us.

26. 永远不要去问女士她是否怀孕，请让她自己决定是否要说。（问一位女士是否怀孕是不礼貌的）

Never ask a woman if she is pregnant. Let her tell you if she is.

27. 有三样东西是你需要的：有能力不放弃某样东西直到它成功，有能力放弃不起作用的东西，以及信任其他人来帮助你区分这两者。

Three things you need: The ability to not give up something till it works, the ability to give up something that does not work, and the trust in other people to help you distinguish between the two.

28. 公开演讲时，要经常停顿。在你用新的方式说话之前停顿，在你说出你认为重要的事情之后停顿，停顿作为一种缓冲，可以让听众吸收细节。

When public speaking, pause frequently. Pause before you say something in a new way, pause after you have said something you believe is important, and pause as a relief to let listeners absorb details.

29. 没有所谓的 "准时"。你要么迟到，要么提前，都是你的选择。

There is no such thing as being “on time.” You are either late or you are early. Your choice.

30. 要拥抱曲折，生活对于每个人来说都不是一条直路。问问任何一个你钦佩的人，他们的幸运都发生在远离主要目标的弯路上。

Ask anyone you admire: Their lucky breaks happened on a detour from their main goal. So embrace detours. Life is not a straight line for anyone.

31. 在互联网上获得正确答案的最好方法是，发布一个明显错误的答案，然后等待某人来纠正你。（得到正确答案之前，也许你会收获恶意，请忽略它）

The best way to get a correct answer on the internet is to post an obviously wrong answer and wait for someone to correct you.

32. 鼓励好的行为取得的成效是惩罚坏行为的十倍，对于小孩和动物尤其如此。

You’ll get 10x better results by elevating good behavior rather than punishing bad behavior, especially in children and animals.

33. 花尽可能多的时间来制作电子邮件的标题，因为标题通常是人们阅读的唯一内容。

Spend as much time crafting the subject line of an email as the message itself because the subject line is often the only thing people read.

34. 生活不是等待风暴过去，而是学会如何在雨中跳舞。

Don’t wait for the storm to pass; dance in the rain.

35. （前）雇主工作推荐信一般都不会留下任何负面评价，所以可以给这些（前）雇主发送一个消息，“如果你强烈推荐这个求职者是超级棒的，请给我回信”。如果他们不回复，则可以默认评价是负面的。

When checking references for a job applicant, employers may be reluctant or prohibited from saying anything negative, so leave or send a message that says, “Get back to me if you highly recommend this applicant as super great.” If they don’t reply take that as a negative.

36. 请使用密码管理器。这样更安全、更易于使用，更好。

Use a password manager: Safer, easier, better.

37. 受教育而学到的一半技能是用于学习哪些东西能被忽略。

Half the skill of being educated is learning what you can ignore.

38. 荒唐且极具野心的目标的好处是，设立了非常高的标准，所以即便失败，也能将其看作一种普通意义上的成功。

The advantage of a ridiculously ambitious goal is that it sets the bar very high so even in failure it may be a success measured by the ordinary.

39. 了解自己最好的方法是，认真反思每一件你觉得别人让你讨厌的事。

A great way to understand yourself is to seriously reflect on everything you find irritating in others.

40. 如果不想在酒店的房间里落下任何东西，就把你所有的东西都放在能看得见的地方，而不要放在抽屉里，并且都集中到一个地方。如果你需要把充电器之类的东西放在一边，就在它旁边放几件其他的大件物品，因为你留下三件物品的可能性比留下一件要小。

Keep all your things visible in a hotel room, not in drawers, and all gathered into one spot. That way you’ll never leave anything behind. If you need to have something like a charger off to the side, place a couple of other large items next to it, because you are less likely to leave 3 items behind than just one.

41. 拒绝或回避赞美是无礼的。即使你认为它不值得，也要充满感谢地接受它。

Denying or deflecting a compliment is rude. Accept it with thanks, even if you believe it is not deserved.

42. 一定要阅读纪念碑旁边的牌匾。（这是一项全球性倡议的行为 Read the Plaque ，要大家不要忘记历史）

Always read the plaque next to the monument.

43. 当你取得一些成功时，会产生一些冒名顶替者的焦虑。但是，当你创造出只有你——凭借你独特的才能和经验——才能做到的事情时，那么你绝对不是冒名顶替者。成功是你应得的。做只有你能做的事情是你的责任。

When you have some success, the feeling of being an imposter can be real. Who am I fooling? But when you create things that only you — with your unique talents and experience — can do, then you are absolutely not an imposter. You are the ordained. It is your duty to work on things that only you can do.

44. 在逆境中做的事要比顺境中做的事更加重要。

What you do on your bad days matters more than what you do on your good days.

45. 去做对别人有益的事。

Make stuff that is good for people to have.

46. 做事要干净利索。（当你使用颜料时，哪怕是一丁点，无论你多么小心，它们总会找到你的衣服。所以，你需要穿合适的衣服）。

When you open paint, even a tiny bit, it will always find its way to your clothes no matter how careful you are. Dress accordingly.

47. 为了让年幼的孩子在汽车公路旅行中保持良好的行为习惯，可以准备一袋他们最喜欢的糖果，每次他们行为不端时就向窗外扔一块。

To keep young kids behaving on a car road trip, have a bag of their favorite candy and throw a piece out the window each time they misbehave.

48. 你不可能让聪明人仅仅为了钱而卖命。

You cannot get smart people to work extremely hard just for money.

49. 当你不知道应该为了某件工作给人支付多少费用的时候，你可以问他“你觉得给多少才算合理”，他们通常会给出那个合理的报价。

When you don’t know how much to pay someone for a particular task, ask them “what would be fair” and their answer usually is.

50. 90%的东西都是垃圾。如果你认为你不喜欢歌剧、爱情小说、TikTok、乡村音乐、素食、NFT，继续尝试，看看你是否能找到那不是垃圾的10%。

90% of everything is crap. If you think you don’t like opera, romance novels, TikTok, country music, vegan food, NFTs, keep trying to see if you can find the 10% that is not crap.

51. 你对待那些对你没有任何帮助的人的方式，同时也会成为别人评判你的标准。

You will be judged on how well you treat those who can do nothing for you.

52. 我们向来高估了一天能做的事情，也低估了十年能达到的成就。只需要十年时间，奇迹也能达成。一个长期策略能累计大量小成就来克服大问题。

We tend to overestimate what we can do in a day, and underestimate what we can achieve in a decade. Miraculous things can be accomplished if you give it ten years. A long game will compound small gains to overcome even big mistakes.

53. 感谢改变你人生的那位老师。

Thank a teacher who changed your life.

54. 你无法说服某人放弃一个连他们自己都无法被说服的观念。

You cant reason someone out of a notion that they didn’t reason themselves into.

55. 事实上，你应该申请你并未能完全胜任的工作。它将成为最适合你的工作，因为你将会为它拼劲全力。

Your best job will be one that you were unqualified for because it stretches you. In fact only apply to jobs you are unqualified for.

56. 购买二手书。它们的内容和新书是一样的。图书馆里的书也一样。

Buy used books. They have the same words as the new ones. Also libraries.

57. 你可以成为任何你想成为的人，所以，要成为那个有能力提前结束会议的人。

You can be whatever you want, so be the person who ends meetings early.

58. 有位智者说过，“在你开口讲话前，要三思”。第一思，“你所言是否真实？”；第二思，“你所言是否有必要？”；第三思：“你所言是否向善？”。

A wise man said, “Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates. At the first gate, ask yourself, “Is it true?” At the second gate ask, “Is it necessary?” At the third gate ask, “Is it kind?”

59. （能走楼梯的时候）选择走楼梯。

Take the stairs.

60. 你实际支付给某样东西的成本至少是它列出价格的两倍。因为你还需要花费精力、时间、金钱来设置、学习、维护、修理以及最后的处置。标签上并不会列出它的全价。

What you actually pay for something is at least twice the listed price because of the energy, time, money needed to set it up, learn, maintain, repair, and dispose of at the end. Not all prices appear on labels. Actual costs are 2x listed prices.

61. 当你到达酒店的房间时，请找到紧急出口。这只需要一分钟时间。

When you arrive at your room in a hotel, locate the emergency exits. It only takes a minute.

62. 回答 "我现在应该做什么？"的唯一有效方式是首先解决 "我应该成为谁 "的问题。

The only productive way to answer “what should I do now?” is to first tackle the question of “who should I become?”

63. 在高于平均水平的时间段内持续的平均回报会产生非凡的结果。所以，买入并持有。

Average returns sustained over an above-average period of time yield extraordinary results. Buy and hold.

64. 对粗鲁的人陌生人极具礼貌，这令人赞叹。

It’s thrilling to be extremely polite to rude strangers. （thrilling 是正面词性，令人激动）

65. 一个不太聪明的人，如果能很好地沟通，有可能比一个不能很好沟通的超级聪明人做得更好。这是一个好消息，因为提高沟通能力比提高智力要容易得多。

It’s possible that a not-so smart person, who can communicate well, can do much better than a super smart person who can’t communicate well. That is good news because it is much easier to improve your communication skills than your intelligence.

66. 偶尔被骗是信任每个人最好的一面的微小代价，因为当你信任别人最好的一面时，他们通常也会对你最好。

Getting cheated occasionally is the small price for trusting the best of everyone, because when you trust the best in others, they generally treat you best.

67. 艺术就是你可以摆脱的任何东西。 （参考：http://ardellpadenom.blogspot.com/2011/05/art-is-anything-you-can-get-away-with.html）

Art is whatever you can get away with.

68. 为了在孩子身上取得最好的效果，请只花你认为应该花的一半的钱，但要付出双倍的时间来陪伴他们。

For the best results with your children, spend only half the money you think you should, but double the time with them.

69. 购买最新的关于你家乡或地区的旅游指南。每年扮演一次游客，可以学到很多东西。

Purchase the most recent tourist guidebook to your home town or region. You’ll learn a lot by playing the tourist once a year.

70. 不要为了吃著名的东西而排队。它们很少值得等待。

Dont wait in line to eat something famous. It is rarely worth the wait.

71. 想要让你刚认识的人快速展现他的真实性格，可以让他们连接一个速度极慢的 Wifi，然后观察他的表现。

To rapidly reveal the true character of a person you just met, move them onto an abysmally slow internet connection. Observe.

72. 成功的秘诀:做一些奇怪的事情。让你的怪异成为习惯。

Prescription for popular success: do something strange. Make a habit of your weird.

73. 做一个专家。备份你的备份。至少要有一个物理备份和一个云端的备份。每个备份都要多于一个。如果你丢失了你的所有数据、照片、笔记，你会花多少钱来找回它们？与遗憾相比，备份很便宜。

Be a pro. Back up your back up. Have at least one physical backup and one backup in the cloud. Have more than one of each. How much would you pay to retrieve all your data, photos, notes, if you lost them? Backups are cheap compared to regrets.

74. 不要相信你认为你相信的一切。

Dont believe everything you think you believe.

75. 重要的事情要声明三遍！

To signal an emergency, use the rule of three; 3 shouts, 3 horn blasts, or 3 whistles.

76. 在餐厅，你是点你知道的好东西，还是尝试新东西？你是做你知道会卖的东西还是尝试新的东西？你是继续和新朋友约会，还是试着对已经认识的人作出承诺？探索新事物与利用它们的最佳平衡点是：1/3。把1/3的时间花在探索上，2/3的时间花在深化上。随着年龄的增长，将时间投入到探索中是比较困难的，因为它似乎是无益的，但目标是1/3。

At a restaurant do you order what you know is great, or do you try something new? Do you make what you know will sell or try something new? Do you keep dating new folks or try to commit to someone you already met? The optimal balance for exploring new things vs exploiting them once found is: 1/3. Spend 1/3 of your time on exploring and 2/3 time on deepening. It is harder to devote time to exploring as you age because it seems unproductive, but aim for 1/3.

77. 真正的好机会并不会标榜自己是好机会。

Actual great opportunities do not have “Great Opportunities” in the subject line.

78. 当被介绍给某人时，进行眼神交流并坚持4秒。你们都会记得彼此。

When introduced to someone make eye contact and count to 4. You’ll both remember each other.

79. 如果你发现自己在想 "我的好刀在哪里？或者，我的好笔在哪里？" 这意味着你有坏的东西。扔掉那些。

Take note if you find yourself wondering “Where is my good knife? Or, where is my good pen?” That means you have bad ones. Get rid of those.

80. 当你被卡住时，向别人解释你遇到的问题。通常情况下，简单地阐述一个问题就等价于提出了一个解决方案。让 "解释问题 "成为你排除故障过程的一部分。

When you are stuck, explain your problem to others. Often simply laying out a problem will present a solution. Make “explaining the problem” part of your troubleshooting process.

81. 在购买花园水管、延长线或梯子时，要买比你认为需要的更长的尺寸。这将是正确的尺寸。

When buying a garden hose, an extension cord, or a ladder, get one substantially longer than you think you need. It’ll be the right size.

82. 不要费力地与旧事物作斗争；只管建设新事物。

Dont bother fighting the old; just build the new.

83. 只需要表达你的欣赏之情，你的团队就可以实现超越你能力范围的伟大成就。

Your group can achieve great things way beyond your means simply by showing people that they are appreciated.

84. 每个人十岁的时候，都是他生命的巅峰？（没有理解这句的意义，请理解它的读者告知！多谢！）

When someone tells you about the peak year of human history, the period of time when things were good before things went downhill, it will always be the years of when they were 10 years old — which is the peak of any human’s existence.

85. 你和那些惹你生气的东西一样大。（同样不理解）

You are as big as the things that make you angry.

86. 与听众交谈时，最好将目光集中在几个人身上，而不是“扫射”整个房间。你的眼睛向别人传达你是否真的相信你所说的话。

When speaking to an audience it’s better to fix your gaze on a few people than to “spray” your gaze across the room. Your eyes telegraph to others whether you really believe what you are saying.

87. 习惯远比灵感更可靠。通过养成习惯来取得进步。不要把注意力放在塑身上。要专注于成为那种从不错过锻炼的人。

Habit is far more dependable than inspiration. Make progress by making habits. Dont focus on getting into shape. Focus on becoming the kind of person who never misses a workout.

88. 谈判时，不要为了分得更大的一杯羹，而是要创造一个更大的蛋糕。（寻求共赢）

When negotiating, dont aim for a bigger piece of the pie; aim to create a bigger pie.

89. 如果你把今天所做的事情再重复365次，你明年会不会达到你想要的目标？

If you repeated what you did today 365 more times will you be where you want to be next year?

90. 你只能看到别人的2%，别人也只能看到你的2%。将你们自己调整到隐藏的98%。

You see only 2% of another person, and they see only 2% of you. Attune yourselves to the hidden 98%.

91. 你的时间和空间都是有限的。移除、放弃、扔掉你生活中不再能激发你快乐的东西，以便为那些能激发你快乐的东西腾出空间。

Your time and space are limited. Remove, give away, throw out things in your life that dont spark joy any longer in order to make room for those that do.

92. 我们的后代将创造出令我们惊叹的东西，但如果我们有想象力，他们将创造的东西中有一部分是可以用今天的材料和工具创造出来的。所以，让我们想的更加深远一些。

Our descendants will achieve things that will amaze us, yet a portion of what they will create could have been made with today’s materials and tools if we had had the imagination. Think bigger.

93. 要获得丰厚的回报，请对你不感兴趣的事物特别好奇。

For a great payoff be especially curious about the things you are not interested in.

94. 专注于方向而不是目的地。谁也不知道自己的命运。但保持正确的方向，你就会到达你想去的地方。

Focus on directions rather than destinations. Who knows their destiny? But maintain the right direction and you’ll arrive at where you want to go.

95. 每一个突破一开始都是可笑的和荒谬的。事实上，如果它一开始不是可笑和荒谬的，它就不是一个突破。

Every breakthrough is at first laughable and ridiculous. In fact if it did not start out laughable and ridiculous, it is not a breakthrough.

96. 如果你借了某人20美元，你再也没见过他，因为他不想还你，那你们的关系就值20美元了。

If you loan someone 20.

97. 复制他人是一个好的开始。复制自己却是一种令人失望的结束方式。

Copying others is a good way to start. Copying yourself is a disappointing way to end.

98. 谈判新工作薪水的最佳时机是在他们说想要你之后，而不是之前。这之后，双方就会变成一个看谁先说出金额的鸡肋游戏，但让他们在你之前给出一个数字对你是有利的。

The best time to negotiate your salary for a new job is the moment AFTER they say they want you, and not before. Then it becomes a game of chicken for each side to name an amount first, but it is to your advantage to get them to give a number before you do.

99. 与其引导你的生活去避免意外，不如直接瞄准它们。

Rather than steering your life to avoid surprises, aim directly for them.

100. 如果你使用信用卡租车，请不要购买额外的保险。

Dont purchase extra insurance if you are renting a car with a credit card.

101. 如果你对一个问题的意见可以从你对另一个问题的意见中预测出来，你可能被一种意识形态所控制。当你真正为自己思考时，你的结论就不会被预测。

If your opinions on one subject can be predicted from your opinions on another, you may be in the grip of an ideology. When you truly think for yourself your conclusions will not be predictable.

102. 力争破产而死。在你死前把钱交给你的受益人;它更有趣也更有用。花光所有的钱。你的最后一张支票应该捐给殡仪馆，而且应该被退回。

Aim to die broke. Give to your beneficiaries before you die; it’s more fun and useful. Spend it all. Your last check should go to the funeral home and it should bounce.

103. 防止变老的主要方法是保持惊奇。

The chief prevention against getting old is to remain astonished.

参考资料